EMPATHY, CAN IT WORK?

By Ruth A. Sheets

I have heard Trump supporters, even the American people referred to as “stupid or ignorant, and other even less flattering names.  I have been thinking a lot about this lately and have come to understand they/we are neither stupid nor ignorant.  Overworked, over-stimulated, over-committed, overwhelmed, underestimated, undervalued, under paid, under-informed would be more accurate. 

Our media, particularly social media, run, of course by mostly rich white men who have an agenda of their own generally involving power, accumulation, manipulation, and abuse are partly at fault.  They need eyes and buyers for the products being sold on the media.  They don’t care about the pain this inflicts on the consumers of that media, as long as those eyes lead to passing on the stuff put online that draws more eyes and more investor money.

The media also get help in their corralling of susceptible viewers/voters from employers who consistently underpay and under-appreciate workers, and state governments that deliberately keep those folks needy.  People who are needy can develop frustration, resentment, anger, even deeper negative emotions because life is so difficult and everyone they see on the various media seem to be doing better than they are.  I think of it as the “Leave It To Beaver” syndrome, named after the 1950s-1960s show where everyone lived in perfect little houses in perfect white neighborhoods with only a few rascals like minor bully Eddie to deal with.  That was the life every white family was supposed to live in America, right?  What happened when one’s life didn’t work out that way:  more than 2 kids, a job that didn’t allow one to afford that perfect little house, mean kids in the neighborhood, teachers too exhausted to spend sufficient time working with each child (some of whom had a disability or other learning difference), had only one parent, both parents needed to work to make ends meet?  You get the idea. 

The very rich who are orchestrating the division in our country are doing just fine.  They have had every advantage and believe they “did it all by themselves, no help, no need of direction or limitation.  They have milked nearly everything they can get from the poor and working-class people over time.  They have often done it so subtly their victims have not noticed, and they have been permitted to accomplish this nearly with impunity.  They have used their money and influence to buy candidates and legislators as well as judges and justices willing to impose the right-wing will.  They sponsor pay-day lenders, cut federal assistance programs, poorly finance work training programs which are often required for financial assistance, underfund schools, institute regressive sales taxes, allow rent and price-gouging, and on and on, none of which negatively impact the rich, of course. 

It seems to me when a group of mostly white people (who believe they should be, but don’t want to admit they are privileged in every way) has been misused and misdirected so badly, one can expect trouble.  When those same white folks are being informed by their legislators and media they are about to be replaced by those people whom they think want a chunk of that privilege, it is a problem.  If they tie that belief in “replacement theory,” to the massive changes that are overtaking them:  global warming, inflation, inability to keep up with the Jones’s, and their many other challenges, I am amazed that more of them are not trying to grasp in desperation at things which are untrue, harmful, and even self-defeating. 

Putting down the Trumpers and Trumpettes may seem a good idea to some, but right now, those folks are struggling and feel that Donald Trump, child-man that he is, is all they have.  They like the rah rah, the insults, and deliberately ignore the blatant lies.  They have been shaped over time to believe that men who are the loudest and most insulting must be strong, real men, a lie of course, but who has time to reason that out when being hit with so many lies through the media they consume).  Even if they do recognize the lies, they can't afford to acknowledge them.  Their hero, their savior, can’t be a liar, a criminal, can he? 

Division/Polarization is largely the work of right-wing leaders, right now, Republicans.  They even say the thing out loud as Marjorie Taylor Greene did when she said we should have a civil war.  She has no clue what that would be  but expects if there were violence, she would be above it all or victorious in the thick of the fight with her little gun.  I guess she thinks all the guns in white hands will  give her and her rich buddies a win (whatever that means in their minds. 

I do worry about polarization, but what worries me more, as I have come to see it, is that so much of this division is carefully planned and serves the very rich, mostly white, mostly male folks who are extremely desperate for power.  They are willing to bring down everything, believing they have the right, and what it takes to create something new that will put them permanently at the top of something (whatever we end up with, of course).  We have permitted those rich ruling wannabees to encroach on our rights, our lives, and our peace of mind.  That, to me is the greatest conspiracy going on right now, and there is pretty good evidence it is real. 

Some evidence of this “conspiracy” might include:  the behavior of our social media owners in permitting bad behavior online as long as it is by the right-wing and Republicans (OK, no one should own a media entity, even if they start one); the purchase of our legislators at all levels by the very rich; The Supreme Court Right-wing supermajority working to break our Constitution in favor of rich white men and corporations. 

In addition, just check out the kinds of laws being passed in “red” states around this country.  They are not laws to improve anyone's lives, not even rich guy lives.  They are meant to hurt, divide, diminish, and infuriate.  If they can keep all of us hating each other, those richers can move in and claim (whine) they know how to fix things (yes, the things they broke – but they can’t even if they wanted to, and they don’t want to).  Their goal is primarily accumulation of power and money (prestige wouldn’t be turned down either).  They want to break even more, ala Trump, DeSantis, McCarthy, and the “Freedom Caucus” (anti-Americanists all).

For the corps of anti-Americanists, who claim to be so patriotic, fascism is looking great right now.  They even hold their meetings in Hungary where President Orbán is working to create his own fascist state, building on his own BS with which he has been covering the Hungarian people. 

This group of fascists in training on both sides of the Atlantic, is quite clever.  Here, they have been able to get people to think it a good idea to split our United States apart, possibly into several individual nations.  I guess the most powerful will each try to take one of the newly divided segments to rule.  They won’t couch it in terms of a steal, but wealth makes people think they should get whatever they want.  Some will fight those who oppose them, or rather, they will con others into fighting for them.  There is not a lot of courage evident right now among the “out” disrupters.

Empathy has been defined as the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.  I consider it a critical virtue.  We are hearing that we can’t really empathize with those who are too different from ourselves and we are also being told which people those are.  White Christians are being targeted most intensely with this right-wing message: “You are superior to every other race or group; it is god’s will that you rule; you can hurt people in those other groups before they hurt you, and they will hurt you,” etc.  Empathy is impossible!   

We are all being pushed to ditch positive virtues in favor of the non-virtues like hatred, distrust, anger, fear, dismissal, bullying, vilifying, and more rather than caring, love, appreciation, understanding, hope, and the rest.  We don't have to go along with it, and we certainly don't have to participate in it.  We truly can do better but it will take a lot of work, and even more courage and determination.  Inclusion is hard, but when it works it is amazing and everyone can win.  We need to make it work here for the sake of our nation and our world.

Please understand I am not letting those who are stirring up the fascist soup and force-feeding it to a lot of vulnerable people off the hook.  They have a lot to answer for and have not been held accountable for anything they have done lately.  Rarely do they get put out of office, no matter how badly they behave and go against their oath of office and our Constitution.  Right now, though, I want to focus on the people who are suffering from their latching onto appalling leadership that does not deserve their loyalty.

I know this is counter-intuitive, but it seems to me an important way to address this very real challenge is to keep doing things to help make life better for those people under the Trump spell:  make sure their roads are usable, they have clean water, affordable electricity and broadband, their children can attend good clean, well-staffed schools, their local newspapers still operate to bring them honest news of local events and people, employers pay a living wage, they have a hospital closer than 100 miles from their home, and they can afford life's basics.  Then it must be made clear over and over in case they miss it the first, second, and third times, who it is that has helped get those things for them, nearly always Democrats.  It is worth a try for reaching disaffected people who are vulnerable to the messages of division and polarization.  what has been going on clearly has not worked, and we all know what it is to keep doing the same things over and over expecting a different outcome.  (insanity)